PlanetRomeo’s gay dating glossary

In the age of online dating, everything is supposed to be easy. Meeting guys, arranging dates and swapping pics can all be done more quickly and simply than ever before, and yet sometimes just chatting to a guy can feel super confusing. These days, unless you know your terminology, it can be hard to work out exactly what a guy is into and just what he’s looking for. Sometimes guys get in touch with us to ask what some of the acronyms on our PlanetRomeo profiles mean. For example, what exactly is WS? And what does it mean if a guy is into FF? So we decided to round up some of the more common terms along with their definitions so you never need to be confused again…

420 friendly – If a guy mentions 420, it means he likes to smoke marijuana. The term is thought to have originated in the US in the 1970s, and since then, April 20th (or 4/20 if you’re American) has become a counterculture holiday where people gather to smoke and celebrate weed.


Accom – Accommodate. If a guy can accom, you can hook up at his place, if he can’t, you’ll have to invite him to yours.

AP – Ass play. This could be anything from anal sex to playing with toys.

BB – Bareback sex, or anal sex without a condom. If you’re concerned about HIV, you can find your nearest test center here.

BDSM – A term that encompasses bondage, dominance, discipline, submission, sadism and masochism. This can include all kinds of things, but most commonly involves tying up, blindfolding or inflicting pain.


CBT – Cock and ball torture. This can include various activities, from squeezing and twisting using your hands or using toys that do it for you.

CD – Cross-dressing. Normally used by guys who enjoy wearing dresses, stockings, wigs, make-up and underwear designed for women. But remember that there’s a big difference between cross-dressing and being transgender. While cross-dressers normally identify as men, and will only cross-dress some of the time, trans women identify as women and live their lives as such.

CF/Chem friendly – Not opposed to, neutral about, or actively-interested in the (usually mutual) use of illicit substances as an accompaniment or enhancement during sexual activity.

DL – Down low. If a guy is on the DL, it means he isn’t out yet and needs to be discreet.

Dom – Dominant. Dom guys are typically tops (but not always), and tend to like playing with more submissive guys.

DTF – Down to fuck. If a guy is DTF, he’s looking for a hook-up.

FF – Fist fucking or fisting. If you’re into FF, you can specify whether you’re passive or active on your PlanetRomeo profile.

FWB – Friends with benefits. Friends who aren’t in a relationship but like to hook up for sex from time to time.


LGBTQIA – An umbrella term used for people who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning, intersex or asexual. Some variations include a + at the end to encompass people who don’t identify as one of the above but are still queer or non-straight in some way.

LTR – Long-term relationship.

Non-scene – Non-scene guys avoid gay bars and clubs and tend to hang out in more ‘straight-oriented’ places.

NSA – No strings attached. Guys looking for NSA or ‘NSA fun’ are looking for a simple hook-up that is unlikely to result in a second date. They’d rather go straight to bed for a steamy sessions than take you out for a candlelit dinner.


PnP – Party and play. Essentially, this means having sex while high on drugs, sometimes referred to as chemsex.

Poz – Short for positive with respect to HIV status.

Scat – Sex involving fecal matter (that’s plain old shit in basic terms).

Side – A guy who is neither top, bottom or versatile. Sides tend not to partake in anal sex and prefer to have sex in different ways, for example oral sex or through using toys.

SM – Sado masochism. Getting pleasure from inflicting or receiving pain.

Sub – Submissive. The perfect partner for a dom (see above), a sub is a guy who likes to be dominated in the bedroom.

TT – Tit torture. When it comes to guys, this refers to nipple play, which normally involves biting, twisting or using clamps.


TV – Transvestism. Not to be confused with being transgender, a transvestite is a guy who wears ‘women’s’ clothes. Also knows as cross-dressing (see above).

Vanilla – Vanilla sex is simply sex that doesn’t involve elements of BDSM or behaviour that could be considered kinky. It can be anything from oral to anal, but won’t include fetishes or toy play.

WS – Water sports. Sometimes called piss play, WS is for guys with a fetish for urine. It involves being pissed on or pissing on someone else, depending on who is taking on the role of sub and dom.

Dating slang is constantly evolving with new terms being coined all the time. Can you think of a word or acronym you can’t see here? Let us know and we’ll add it to our list!