How to date guys from around the world
Here at PlanetRomeo, we’re an international bunch. In our two offices in Berlin and Amsterdam, we have guys from all over the world, giving us a glimpse into how gay men from different countries like to date. We decided to talk to some of the guys here to find out the best ways to impress a guy from their country and work out which dating tips are universal and which are country specific.
Ever wanted to impress a guy from Germany? Date an Israeli? Attract a Brazilian? Read on to find out how it’s done…
Jeroen – Junior Designer (Netherlands)
I would definitely say Dutch guys are very direct in their approach. They can be very forward and straight to the point. If they want sex, they’ll say so straight away. If you’re direct too – that’s appreciated a lot.
I think Dutch guys like to go for a first date either to a bar or to their house because when they like someone, they don’t want to be disturbed. After a first date, they’ll already ask you if you want to meet up again. They like to know what to expect and whether there’s more to come – but I think that’s just the gay community in general.
I think the Dutch complain a lot but they also pay attention to you, and look further than just your appearance. Be yourself and don’t rush it – but be cautious no one is trying to take advantage.
Shir – Head of Advertising (Israel)
We have a saying in Hebrew that Israelis are like cacti in that they’re prickly outside and very sweet inside. That’s how we define ourselves. And I think that’s fair. We have a distance at the beginning and we can act a bit reserved and cold but Israelis are complete fools for love. We believe mostly in monogamy and marriage.
Manners are not part of our culture. We don’t like to talk about money and this whole idea of splitting a bill is super annoying. We like to see chivalry and generosity – we’re as cheesy as they come. All these American movies have had an influence on Israeli men.
For me, a perfect date would not be the movies or a restaurant but actually going hiking or on a bike ride or doing a gym class together – something that’s not the regular stuff. We also love sports so if you could incorporate that within a date that would be good.
Israelis are fun, easygoing and loyal. In Israel we have no such thing as a topic we can’t laugh about. There is nothing that’s taboo. But seriousness is something that we don’t like because when we’re at work, we’re super serious, but when we’re on a date it’s the opposite. Israel is a very equal culture, so even when you’re gay, you need someone who can hold an argument with you. We don’t like people we could step on.
Leonhardt – DevOps Engineer (Germany)
You find all sorts of guys in Germany and for me, it largely depends on where they’re from. Usually northern guys are more reserved and southern guys are more outgoing. Our humour is very diverse – you’ll find everything from simple puns to dark sarcasm, but I’d say humour is the key to conquering a German’s heart.
For a first date, it depends on the season, but generally a comfy neighbourhood bar or pub where you can eat, drink and talk is a good choice. Personally, I’m totally unimpressed when I get invited to a too fancy and pricy place, it makes me want to leave earlier.
Talk about travel and what you like about Germany or why you went there. Many Germans enjoy talking about work, but I’m unsure about politics – personally I like to talk politics with foreigners, but that depends on their knowledge of European politics and history. However many Germans don’t like talking politics so much. And don’t say that you like Angela Merkel – for me, that’s just a sign you have no idea what’s going on.
Rogério – Creative Director (Brazil)
Brazilians are very flirty but they tend to be a little conventional in terms of masculine and feminine roles, knowing who is top and who is bottom, who is macho and who isn’t. Brazilian guys love giving compliments and they’re very passionate. They love to date foreigners, especially if they’re from the USA or Europe.
People imagine Brazilians as being hot, horny and sexually forward and they’re generally correct. But being romantic is the way to a Brazilian’s heart – or a good combination of sex and romance. Because Brazil is a very Catholic country, there’s a sense of double standards. They say sex isn’t important, but it’s actually super important. You have to learn to deal with the discrepancy between what people say and what they do. Most people say they like poetry and cinema but they rarely say they like to get fucked.
In Brazil, you don’t bring people home for a date because it can be dangerous. Meet a guy in a public space instead. Brazilians appreciate someone who can have a good time and who is light-hearted and humorous. The idea of being sensible and responsible will bore them very easily. Don’t talk about Brazilian politics and you should avoid talking about money and your salary. You will be able to infer that by their car and clothing anyway.
Alex – Social Media (UK)
If you don’t come from the UK, impressing a Brit can be relatively easy – especially if you have a nice accent. Mediterranean, American and Australian guys in particular are very popular. British guys can be reserved and hard to read. We aren’t as loud or as outgoing as our European neighbours, so it can take a bit of time to get to know us.
Don’t be arrogant or talk about money – that’s a huge turn off. Talk about something more interesting than work – British people work a lot, so it’s nice to talk about something different on a date. Politics is OK, but only if you have similar beliefs. British guys don’t want to argue with you, especially on a first date.
Dress casually – jeans are always a safe bet and you can’t go wrong with a nice jumper or shirt. British people aren’t always super romantic, so don’t come on too strong. Don’t talk about marriage or even the next date unless you’re sure he’s interested – and definitely don’t hold his hand unless he tries to first.
A good sense of humour is the most important thing. If you can make a British guy laugh, you’re doing well. Dark, weird and ironic humour is popular in the UK, so don’t be afraid of being risqué – we like guys who can be a little edgy.
Tommy – Advertising Officer (Austria)
Austrians are a talkative, drunk bunch but how to date them depends on if they’re from Vienna or the country. In the countryside, more of the dating happens online because there are no bars to go to, so if you’re dating a country man, it’s better if you’re masculine so people don’t notice in the street.
Austrians are loud and they like a good lively conversation, so don’t be shy. They like manly, down-to-earth people. They can be conservative, so they don’t like things too over the top. The English isn’t so good in Austria, so for a real date, they would rather have someone they can talk to, but for a sex date, they’re willing to explore.
Austrians are beer drinkers. For a first date, you could go to a café or sit and drink beer outside. But don’t talk about politics. And don’t be stuck up. Austrians are humorous people, so if someone is too stiff they don’t like that – it’s not a big turn on.
Kerry – Copywriter (USA)
Be foreign – that helps, and with a nice accent. Americans like people who smile and who can at least have a conversation, because they like to date the old-fashioned way as well as have sex dates. Music is a good conversation starter but talking about your problems is a turn-off, and so is boasting about your successes.
It helps if you know how to wear a pair of jeans. Even if you don’t have a butt you can still wear jeans that flatter you. Flexibility is important – be able to dress up and down. In the north, where I went to school, people are a lot more traditional and they have a tendency to wear more suits and shirts, more formal clothing. In the southern states, they have a more laid-back way of dressing. You’d think the dress code would reflect the mindset, but it doesn’t. In the north, they’re more open-minded than the people in the south.
Americans can appear friendlier than Europeans, and more approachable, but that’s not really the case. If you really want to get an American’s attention then smile – but be careful if you have bad teeth, because that’s a turn off. Give the impression that you’re hanging on their every word, like they’re the most interesting thing since Gaga. Make them feel important and intelligent but don’t be argumentative. Americans can be intellectual, but there’s a time and a place.
Gui – Head of Marketing and Sales (Belgium)
Belgian guys aren’t as approachable as, for example, American or Dutch guys. They don’t chitchat for no reason but once you succeed in getting to know them, you can have a more in-depth conversation about practically anything. So when in Belgium, it can be hard to meet people, but once you do, you’ll know them for a long time.
Belgian guys will not try to impress you so don’t try to impress them. Make sure you get their attention, but be subtle, do it in a flirty way rather than being too obvious because that will turn them off. Don’t talk about money and don’t talk about all the typical Belgian things (like chocolates and waffles). Belgian guys may seem reserved but they are not afraid to share their opinions, even on a date. They can be shy, but are very openminded, especially when it comes to sex.
If you’re going on a dinner date with a Belgian guy, know that when we go dining, it can take hours. They can go on chatting whereas in some other cultures it’s just about finishing your meal. We have a more French style of dining and drink wine at lunch. If you’re dating a Belgian guy, don’t try too hard – remember that playing hard to get is more interesting than being too keen.